


HOW TO HAVE FUN AT YULETIDE

by Naraht



Category: Yuletide RPF
Genre: Capslock, Humor, Meta
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-06-06
Updated: 2010-06-06
Packaged: 2017-10-09 22:57:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 290
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/92506
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Naraht/pseuds/Naraht
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>HEARKEN TO THE HIPPOS.<br/>NEVER ASK FOR WHOM THE HIPPO DANCES.<br/>IT DANCES FOR YOU.</p>
            </blockquote>





	HOW TO HAVE FUN AT YULETIDE

**Author's Note:**

> This actually started as a list of fandoms that I plan to nominate next year. It got out of control. And yes, I do plan to nominate a song by The Smiths. Maybe more than one.
> 
> [This was written after Yuletide 2008. No, I didn't nominate a Smiths song in the following year. Oh well.]

COME UP WITH SMALLER SOURCE TEXTS  
SMALLER. SMALLER. REALLY SMALL.  
LIKE A HAIKU.   
MAYBE.

PICK SONGS.  
SMITHS SONGS.  
REALLY DEPRESSING SMITHS SONGS.  
(ARE THERE ANY OTHER KIND?)

WORRY THAT YOUR AUTHOR WILL DEFAULT.  
WORRY THAT YOUR "DEAR SANTA" LETTER WILL MAKE YOUR AUTHOR DEFAULT.  
(IT WILL.)

HIT REFRESH.  
HIT REFRESH AGAIN.  
SEE HOW QUICKLY YOU CAN MAKE THE DATABASE FALL OVER.

BECOME THE STAR OF YULETIDE CHAT.  
REQUEST YULETIDE CHAT RPF.  
ABOUT YOURSELF.  
(DO NOT LET YOUR MOTHER FIND THE WEBSITE.)

REQUEST RPF - MISC ACTORS.  
ANY.  
AND MEAN IT.

HEARKEN TO THE HIPPOS.  
NEVER ASK FOR WHOM THE HIPPO DANCES.  
IT DANCES FOR YOU.

HIT REFRESH AGAIN.  
DO NOT TRUST THE RELOADER.  
THEY LIE.  
YOU MUST SEE THE NUMBERS FOR YOURSELF.

REQUEST FANTASIA FANFIC.  
RACK YOUR BRAINS.  
(ARE THERE ANY OTHER FANDOMS WITH DANCING HIPPOS?)

HIT REFRESH AGAIN.

PINCH HIT AT THE LAST MINUTE.  
WRITE 8 STOCKING STUFFERS AT THE LAST MINUTE.  
DEFAULT AT THE LAST MINUTE.  
(CONSEQUENT YULETIDE BANS ARE YOUR OWN RESPONSIBILITY.)

HIT REFRESH AGAIN.  
(CONSEQUENT DATABASE FAILURE IS YOUR OWN FAULT.)

ACCIDENTALLY WRITE 10,000 WORD EPIC THAT NO ONE REQUESTED.  
FILE IT UNDER "RPF-MISC ACTORS."

GIVE YOUR FIC AN INTERESTING TITLE.  
GIVE YOUR FIC A ONE-WORD TITLE.  
LET THE FOLKS IN YULETIDE CHAT PICK YOUR TITLE.  
AT RANDOM.

DON'T BOTHER WITH SUMMARIES.  
ONLY SHALLOW PEOPLE READ SUMMARIES.

FORGET YOUR RECIPIENT'S NAME.  
FORGET YOUR OWN NAME.

GET DRUNK.

HIT REFRESH AGAIN.

START WRITING A DRABBLE AFTER MIDNIGHT.  
WHILE WAITING FOR UPLOADING TO CLOSE.  
KEEP UPLOAD FROM CLOSING JUST SO YOU CAN ADD YOUR 87 WORD DRABBLE.  
LOOK UP THE DEFINITION OF DRABBLE.

PRAY.

DECLARE THAT YOU BELIEVE IN THE DATABASE.

HIT REFRESH AGAIN.

REJOICE.

DANCE WITH THE HIPPOS.

THANK ELYN AND SHALOTT.

DO IT AGAIN NEXT YEAR.


End file.
